Wednesday, December 14, 2011
D*&%! I Got Autocorrected
PC Magazine defines autocorrect as "A feature that corrects misspellings and makes other grammatical changes on the fly." Those of you with smartphones know what it is. You type in "wil;" and it will autocorrect to "will."
But sometimes it fails. Like last Saturday night when I posted "And the Heisman doesn't go up anyone from Alabama."
I didn't pay attention to what posted until the next morning when a friend from church commented, "go UP? go up where? Maybe I don't want to know?"
Oh. My. Goodness!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
It was supposed to be "go to anyone from Alabama." To. TO. TO
My only other big autocorrect failure was when I got my job and posted something to the effect that the job was good, but God was gooder. Autocorrect doesn't recognize "gooder" and corrected it to the word folder. God is folder. Huh?
At least I haven't had any of the massive fails documented on the hilarious website Damn You Auto Correct.
This website is not safe for work. Not only does it contain words that are often inappropriate, it's so stinking funny you'll end up laughing til you cry. And ya don't want your boss coming around asking why you are cackling like a hen laying an egg.
I just wonder if the person or persons who invented autocorrect are laughing as much. I mean, they've created a monster. According to one online source (and we all know how reliable THOSE are), autocorrect wasn't was developed by Microsoft to be used in word processing programs. And from there it has spread to smartphones.
I just wonder how Microsoft gets around the child labor laws because I'm convinced a fourteen-year-old boy in the throes of puberty came up with the autocorrect replacement vocabulary. I mean, how else would "congrats" become "bong rats?" How does an "destination" become "dusty jockitch?" "I'm selling the fridge to my roommate" became a drug deal when autocorrect substituted "drugs" for "fridge."
I ain't making this stuff up, folks. And I'm keeping it clean. Some of it would make a sailor blush.
And just to prove I am not lying, here's a photo of my own screen. In case my mother is reading, I'm still alive and kicking. No autopsy required.
Have you been autocorrected? What's your best (or worst depending on how you look at it)?