Fuzzy Logic

As y’all know, I had foot surgery on Valentine’s Day and I had to spend the first seven to ten days in bed with the foot elevated. I still have to keep it elevated but not as much. It lets me know when it needs rest.

This is your foot. The big toe is called the hallux and this photo shows a normal metatarsophalangeal (MTP) joint, which is where the big toe meets the foot.

This was my foot. I had arthritis in the MTP joint. Those red things are osteophytes, or bone spurs, that form in a degenerating joint. Additionally, I had a bone chip because I broke my big toe about a decade ago, though I didn't know it until the x-ray showed the chip. Surprise!

I'll spare you the surgical photos. Suffice it to say I have about a three inch scar on the top of my foot, but it's a nice scar. My orthopedic surgeon is also a good seamstress. He cleaned out all the osteophytes, removed the bone chip and shaved a little off the bone on both sides of the MTP joint.

My plan was to get lots of writing done. After all, between my AlphaSmart and my laptop, I had easy access to a keyboard of some ilk.

This is your brain.

This is your brain on prescription pain pills.

What I didn’t plan on was being under the influence of Lortabs for ten days. Writing while life is all fuzzy around the edges just isn’t fun. Or productive. Or smart. I gave it a couple tries and everything was garbage. Of course, everyone always says “You can fix garbage, but you can’t fix a blank page.” But it was just too difficult to even try to create the garbage, plus is was really bad, stinky been-in-the-dumpster-for-a-month garbage. So for ten days I did nothing much but watch television shows and movies (thanks Smarty Pants for the bag of DVDs you loaned me). I’ve seen lots of true crime shows, medical programs and discovered “My Big Redneck Wedding.” I’ve never seen bridesmaids wear camouflage before or have the bride mud wrestle in her wedding gown.

I did manage to write a short story two days before my surgery, but it was based around a true situation I was very familiar with, so I didn’t have to create the whole thing from scratch. I knew the plot and the characters; it was mostly a matter of putting the story on paper. And the morning of my surgery (I didn't have to report in until 12:30 PM) I wrote a short feature article and submitted it. The subject matter was #1 son’s birth, so again, I was very familiar with the story and just had to put it into words.

Since I stopped taking the pain pills, I’ve been trying to make up for lost time. I’ve written two short features (again based on my own experiences) and yesterday I FINALLY finished a story I started about a year ago. It was based around a one thousand word writing challenge I did back in June 2005. You never know when something that’s been hanging around on your hard drive will come in handy.

I’m rather proud of myself. I’ve submitted 11241 words since February 13. I have another story in progress (I started it last year too and got stumped with it but now I think I have it all sorted out) and I also began plotting a May-December romance story Monday night. I wrote about two pages of it because I had some dialogue in my head that I wanted on paper before I forgot it.

It feels really nice to be back in the driver's seat (literally and figuratively) and have all the cylinders firing again. I just wish I didn’t have this one bad tire. But this too shall pass.

However, after reading yesterday's wonderful blog by Carla Cassidy, I realize I don't sacrifice enough. Even without pain pills, I watch three episodes of American Idol, one episode of Survivor and one episode of Celebrity Apprentice each week. Sunday night I got hooked on Oprah Winfrey's The Big Give, and Dancing with the Stars begins again on March 17. Maybe I can write a story about a singer/dancer who's marooned on an island with Donald Trump after his chopper crashes while they're looking for a total stranger whose life they'll change with money from Oprah. Yeah, that's the ticket.

What have you done lately that you’re proud of? Are you upset that YauMan was voted off so early? Does David Archuleta rock or what? And what's up with Omarosa? I'd have fired her on week one.

P.S. Yesterday's winner of Carla Cassidy's newest releast is LauraP. Please email Smarty Pants with your name and snail mail info to claim your prize.