How romantic.... (or not!)

I just did an interview where they asked me, “What was the most romantic gift or gesture you’ve ever received?” I have to admit: this was probably the toughest question on the list. It really stumped me. After several false starts, I finally asked DG what he thought his most romantic gesture or gift was. It stumped him too. I’m afraid DG ended up feeling a bit bad about the whole situation.

Not that DG isn’t romantic—he’s just not romantic in those big sweeping ways you see in movies (or read about in certain genres!). No, my Geek has never covered our bed in rose petals or put sweet messages up on a Jumbotron. But I’m okay with that because he’s big on the little gestures. Like leaving work in the middle of the day because I, in my baby-induced-Alzheimer’s state, forgot to save my thesis before closing. After I called him in an utter panic, he showed up to see if it could be retrieved—without me asking him to. Or like rubbing my feet just because it feels good. Or like the time I did one of those sponsored charity walks, but didn’t walk far enough to get the prize I wanted (hey, I walked 20 miles—that’s amazing for me). DG offered to drop my form and money off for me, and slid in a few extra notes to make up the difference. How about the fact he tells me I look great in a bikini, even though there’s an extra 10 pounds on my thighs? The fact he thinks my extreme mood swings are kinda cute? The fact he doesn't ask me to do yard work because I'm afraid of the lawn mower?

They’re all little things—and little things are so easy to take for granted. But it’s the little things that I think are the most romantic of all. After all, it’s those little things—like not eating curry at a restaurant because I can’t stand the smell—that tells me he knows me and thinks about me and my needs all the time. That’s romance—it may not be big or flashy, but it works for me. It may not be something I can build chapters of my books around, but it’s working in real life.

But I did come up with an answer to the question on the interview. It took me a while, and then I wanted to smack myself for not thinking of it immediately. DG left Scotland with little more than a backpack just to be with me. That’s pretty big and grand in the romance gesture department. DG felt much better about his romance skills after that. :-)

So, are you a fan of the big gestures or the little gestures? Is your man a big, flashy romantic who makes all the other girls sigh (and their husbands groan)? And if so, how often do you get those big romantic gestures?

PC

Guest Blogger: Christie Ridgway

Last year I found a great blog called Riding with the Top Down and I've been hanging out there ever since. It's a red convertible full of really cool writers including today's guest blogger. I just read my first book by her and I'm always excited to discover a new author, especially a woman who's in my same position -- the minority in a houseful of men. She's a California gal and married to a man she calls "Surfer Guy." So please give a big playground cowabunga to Christie Ridgway.



Guy Talk.

I’m surrounded by the reality of it, given that I live with my husband and two sons, no other female on the premises. I’m surrounded by the fiction of it too, as I write contemporary romances peopled with heroes that I consider all-guy as all-get-out. So how real are the words in our favorite romance novels? Has any man ever come close to saying to you, in those immortal tones of a Harlequin Presents hero, “You know you’ve been begging for my kiss, you darling little fool.”


Considering this topic, I wrote down what my men said to me this morning, beyond grunts and drowsy mumblings, that is:

“Don’t we have any breakfast meat?”
“Are there bugs in the cereal?”
“I didn’t knock it off the wall with a ball, I was tossing around a shoe.”

Obviously not the stuff of romance novels. But the hero of my next book, HOW TO KNIT A WILD BIKINI (out Tuesday, June 3!), is a writer/editor for a men’s magazine, so you’d think he might be more articulate, and perhaps slightly more, um, subtle, than those Presents men. I searched through the book for the most romantic thing he had to say, thinking he’d be a treasure chest full of knee-weakening bon mots. He turns out to be more “real guy” than I remembered, however. It’s what he does that appeals more to the heroine than what he says.

And that’s all man, isn’t it? They show us how they care, they don’t talk so much about it.

I did discover a lovely line or two, though. Heroine and private chef Nikki Carmichael has one eye that’s green and one eye that’s blue and they’re a source of fascination for the hero, Jay Buchanan. Early in the book he says to her: “Those amazing eyes of yours. When I look into them I don’t know whether I’m going to sink or fly.” Nikki’s response? She decides that murmured thought makes her want to swoon.

I hope you’ll be equally affected when you read the book. It’s the first in a new trilogy—all centered around a hip, surfside yarn shop in Southern California. Publisher’s Weekly says it “combines Malibu beachnik appeal with trendy knitting Zen” and that it’s a story in which “opposites attract, and steam rises in the kitchen and in the bedroom.”

But back to guy talk. What’s your favorite romantic line from a hero—either from fiction or reality? I’m giving away a copy of my new book and I’ll have the Playground Monitor select a winner from among those commenting. It’s great to be visiting here!